BITE ME Mother Fucker!

01.08.2003 - 8:20 pm

What the fuck is wrong with people?! When did the world become so disrespectful? I know I go off on this time and time again... I know this is a public forum and lends me or any of my friends with journals open to other's morals and attitudes. Aren't people taught to respect others by their parents? Or is that only a select few of us in this world? My husband keeps a very different journal than I do (at least I feel it as such). I read his, and he reads mine. I'm not ignorant to his thoughts and feelings. I'm rarely shocked by what he has to say in his journal because we DISCUSS it first! I knew who he is and what makes him tick long before I agreed to marry him and much longer before we got pregnant. I do not in any sense feel that I'm bringing this baby into a world of uncertainty regarding the relationship with my husband. NOR do I feel I'm putting my child at risk because of my husband's sexual desires. Children really aren't supposed to be a part of their parent's sex least not in a NORMAL family relationship. No, we will probably never share with the child that we have (at whatever point it happens) an open relationship, however long it lasts. That's my feeling on the matter and I know Nick will respect that. Is the world at large really that closed-eye to people having open relationships? Isn't that much better than cheating? And spreading disease and distrust? I appreciate and respect that my husband has been so honest with me about wanting a lover outside our relationship. I knew about those desires from about date #3, which was 2 years ago. I won't tolerate cheating, nor do I even believe for a second that he would cheat on me. Granted, this person I'm ranting about right now probably doesn't know how Nick truly feels about me because he doesn't spend every letter of his journal gushing about ME and how wonderful our relationship is. PLU-EEZE! I would puke! Nick is not only about me, and I'm not only about Nick. We need to be individuals. It reminds me of my friend Nia's journal, she went off one time about someone making a comment about the lack of her relationship with her husband. Well, maybe she CHOOSES not to share every little detail of their intimate life because they AGREED that wasn't appropriate or didn't make Hub feel comfortable. My journal is not a complete picture of who I am, it's a snapshot of my life. A mere snapshot. I don't have enough time in the day to write about every little thing and feeling in my life, nor do I have a desire to do that. I may not agree with what Nick or anyone else writes about in their journals…at least I respect their right to be an individual with their own beliefs and thoughts…I don’t attack. Look the fuck out if you attack me first. I fight back. I fight back hard. And if you piss me off enough, I won’t fight fair.

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