11.20.2002 - 6:03 am
I am quasi-torn whether I want to even post this entry. Torn between feelings and justifying my beliefs (which I really don't think I need to do to anyone, either they accept or don't). So I guess it's more of feelings.
I have never been shy about my Pro Choice stance. I fear for a day when abortion is no longer legal in the US. Granted, I don't believe I would ever have an abortion (it would have to be extreme extenuating circumstances like rape, I would not use it as a form of birth control...but that's me). I more strongly believe that women have a right to choose.
If any of you have listened to NPR lately, you have heard the stories about some of the "watching" tactics the FBI or government want to put in place. To the point that we would all be monitored just like Big Brother. I feel that I am fortunate to live in a country where I can voice my opinions and puruse my own dreams. I don't like the feeling of being watched or stalked before the government has even gotten involved. I have been stalked, it's not a pretty picture. I don't want to fear that because I visited a N.O.W. booth at some local craft function that I'm going to be put on a list and marked as a instigator, a trouble-maker, or just plain watched.
That said, maybe I should just not discuss abortion in my journal. One of those topics I agree to keep closer to myself. It's one of those highly taboo topics, people just don't talk about abortion. You can sometimes figure out how a person feels on this issue by little hints. I don't think you often find someone that will just come out and say, "Yes, I'm Pro Choice. I believe abortion should be kept safe and legal in our country".
I really don't feel any differently now that I'm pregnant. I even posted an entry early on in this pregnancy that I was considering not keeping the baby. According to Nick and all the books he has read on the early stages of pregnancy, this is almost normal as a women deals with the emotion and physical changes that are minutes away in her life. We have wanted kids, always talked about a family, there was really no threat of me terminating this pregnancy. My loving & supportive husband knew that all along, he was there for me to go through the emotion I needed to and come to a place of excitement that we are expecting. He knew me well enough to understand me and not freak out himself when I went through those few days of personal turmoil.
Again, I'm back to, I don't need to justify my beliefs. And at the heart of it, I think that is what I've just done.
>(updated 11am) Upon further reflection, I'm thinking that some readers may have thought that I was calling minderella's comments ignorant. That was not what I meant, I was referring to the person she was linking to and the statistics that she provided about abortion. I think it's ignorant to believe that if abortion was no longer legal, that life would be merry & bright. There will be "back-door" abortions that could cause a woman to be infertile or even kill her.
I'm not afraid to stand up for my beliefs and be vocal about them. I'm tired of the barrage of emails and accusations from people. You don't have to agree with me, but don't attack me. I understand that this is a public forum, and I am leaving myself open to some scrutiny. I'm making a conscious decision to stop talking about taboo or controversial topics in my journal because I don't want your comments on that. I respect your opinion, I ask to be respected in return. (laugh) So how "ignorant" is that to expect your respect in return when I don't know you and don't have agreement to respect each other?
(humor people, that was an attempt at humor)
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